Broken Boundaries

We would try to establish boundaries around our behavior, but eventually we’d violate these boundaries.  Some of us decided that we would engage in certain behaviors, but that we wouldn’t bet involved in other things that were dangerous, caused harm to others, or were illegal.  We would act out in so-called “safe” ways, and only fantasize about acting out in forbidden ways. 

Then one day, we crossed those boundaries.  We paid for sex when we thought we never would.  We took risks meeting strangers for sex.  Or we violated the sexual boundaries of others.  We may have promised ourselves that we would not do these things a second time, and yet we did.  Before long, we did them repeatedly, hoping we could stop, while praying that we wouldn’t get caught.

SAA page 5